because….you’re a total doucher

I’ve been turning this over and over in my mind: why can’t I just get the f*** over being dumped by Ducky?
And it dawned on me last night when a former flame called me out of the blue. I hadn’t heard from him for nearly 4 months, but, had become very close to his best buddy since then. As a matter of fact, I consider the former flame’s best buddy to be one of my favourite-est people in the whole world. Why? Because, he’s completely honest with people and his intentions are not a secret agenda. Straight up. He doesn’t promise me the moon and then show up at my doorstep with crumbling rocks and dust. And, I love & appreciate everything about him for it, but, I digress….
The former flame, his existence irritated me until I spoke with him last night. Last night, in my phone conversation with him, I got closure on that little chapter of my life. Now, I’m okay, he can exist without irritating me now.
Ducky on the other hand, in my opinion, at this very moment is a TOTAL DOUCHER for text dumping me with the lame-assed reason of “we don’t want the same things in life”. Lame ass you ask? It’s not something we ever discussed. He has ZERO idea of what I want in life. I don’t have a clue what he wants. Lame ass?
I can only sit and wonder what is wrong with me that I deserved such disrespectful treatment from a man I almost used the “L” word on.
Yes, the “L” bomb, I was ready to worship the very ground he walked on, treat him like a king, was even thinking of cooking for him! Anybody who knows me, knows if I’m cooking for you, you mean the world to me.
The last evening we spent together was complete bliss, full of lovey-dovey cooing and sentiment.
The next time I hear from him, he’s text dumping me. Uh-uh. That’s such a weak, douche bag move that I totally didn’t expect from him. I feel as if the last three months were a total lie, as if I were being used, just played the fool for his entertainment. A foolish plaything.
Considering how I was dumped, I doubt he’ll ever have the man-parts to face me and give me the closure I need to move forward.
And this entire thought process, from my former flame, to my favourite person, to Ducky the Doucher is the reason “why I’m still sad about being dumped”.
Makes complete sense in my head, I’m sure it sounds like absolute nonsense to anyone reading it, but, I don’t care, just writing it out puts me one step closer to just getting the f*** over it.

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