So Confused….

I sit and ponder the events of the past week, the revelations of my former relationship with a man who I believed would never betray me, would never turn his back on me, would always be my best friend, would always be honest with me, would always be real to me.  And my faith in everything is crumbling.  Every belief I held true is being called into question now.  EVERYTHING. Because if my steadfast faith & devotion and unconditional love for this man was wrong, if it was all just a big, fat lie – how could anything else possibly be real?  How can anything at all be right?

I wonder if he knows or cares about the devastation he’s caused?  I wonder if he tells himself the truth?  I wonder if he allows himself to view the world as it is through another person’s eyes?  Does he let himself feel beyond the physical plane of existence?  I wonder how a person could tell another that he loved her one day and then the next say that he hope she dies?  I don’t understand and I don’t know what I’ve done to make him hate me so vehemently.

The only thing I know that is real is that things will never be the same.

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3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. simplysands
    Nov 19, 2012 @ 12:36:23

    I understand what you are saying. It’s so hard when that person changes, and even worse, when they just stop talking to you, and not knowing what happened,; that is what happened to me. I still can’t believe it. I just think its best to give it time.

    Reply

  2. arita77
    Nov 19, 2012 @ 21:07:41

    Thank you for your understanding. To be heard and understood was the thing I was seeking before all this heartache began =(

    Reply

  3. diablo 3 gold
    Dec 02, 2012 @ 09:05:10

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    Reply

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