2015 – A year of…..I’m n0t even really sure what

I closed my 2013 declaring that 2014 was going to be my Bitch.  2014 showed me who exactly the Bitch was in the hardest possible ways, it nearly broke me.

So, when I was closing out 2014 & being introduced to 2015, I decided instead that I wanted it to be my friend.

This was a year of many mixed emotions, none of which I could articulate enough to put pen to paper – or fingers to keyboard.  I did very little writing over the past year.

My high notes were a camping trip with my kids in May & my Son graduating from High School in June.

It was also about finding my place to be, both in my personal life and work.  I cannot thank the people in my life enough for just being themselves and being a part of my life.

I don’t know if I can say that 2015 & I are close friends, but, we are well acquainted & don’t hate each other – we’re parting on civil terms.  I can only hope she gives me a good reference to take with me into 2016.

So, my dear readers, may 2016 bring you all much happiness and good fortune.  Love to all.

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Year End Re-Cap, part 2 – May – August

Taking baby steps in a budding relationship~afraid~A hike down  the Alberni Inlet~Nearly dropped the L-bomb~A call for help from my Daughter~That call for help saved me from depression~Saved me from a potentially abusive relationship~txt dumped after 2 weeks absence~more heartbreak~Therapeutic time on the beach at Thetis Lake~Thought my feet were dirty, turns out they were just tanned~2 month stay in Victoria~Photo bombing tourists at the Inner Harbour~Distressing call from Mom~Plans to go back to Port Alberni~Undersea Gardens~36 hours of moving my daughter from View Royal to Oak Bay~International Buskers Festival~Unpacking~Willow’s Beach~Days with my Son in Victoria~Swimming~A day with the in-laws~Back to Port Alberni~A long, beautiful day at Sproat Lake on a boat with a “hottie with a body”~Fruitless search for work~broke as a joke~strep throat, kinda frightening~having a hard time accepting that sometimes I have to rely on others~being a bad friend for good reasons~Lost another friend~But was she ever really my friend?~Falling in like~Trying not to~Sad about changes in a once good friend~STILL searching for work!~In serious like~happiness has found it’s way back into my life~Afraid that this new found happiness is only fleeting~Savouring every moment~It’s a good feeling to have somebody take care of me & look out for me for a change~Really appreciate his lack of  “me first” attitude.

Year End Re-Cap Part 1

January – April 2013

~Ringing the New Year with strangers~Out of place, belonging nowhere~Sitting in the dark & cold, feeling abandoned, neglected, used & abused~Stuck in Nanaimo for a few days~Visit with a couple of different old friends~Experience my first kiss all over again = Mind.Blown.~Hustle hustle to make some $~Cataloging Hockey Cards for a friend~Car problems~Pretty certain my car was sabotaged~Shut out by certain friends~Kicked when I’m down~Vow to exclude harmful people from my life, no matter what~Turned the lights back on~Things are starting to look up, or so I thought~January was an incredibly heartbreaking month~ February isn’t much better~Terrifying car accident~Car written off~Thankful to be alive~Money slowly getting tighter~Depression sinking in~Trying to concentrate on writing~Money problems make it difficult to concentrate on anything~Three stories submitted to Chicken Soup for the Soul~Admitting to myself that The Jester is gone for good & we were really & truly done & it was Goodbye Forever~Wondering if this heartbreak will ever end?~March has to be a better month for me~Walking everywhere~Sure miss having a car, or even a bicycle~Unable to look for work~ICBC insults me with a crappy offer to settle for my accident~On the verge of eviction~Get some minimal financial relief from a friend~Meet all kinds of shady characters who offer me help that I nearly accept~Again, finances seem to be getting better~April Fool’s!!~Lent my rent money to horrible people who pretended to be my friends~Evicted after being duped out of my rent money~Packing my apartment~Bitter at “friends” who offer to help, but only show me their backs~Even more bitter at the pretend friends who DID supposedly help me by stealing all my furniture~Bitterness turns to anger~Depression deepening~Meet someone new & interesting~Possible sparks~One of my best friends in the whole wide world believes the sh*t he had been hearing about me~End of that friendship~Nearly unbearable heartbreak~How much more do I have to lose?~Oh, wait a minute – THIS is how much more I have to lose:  My home, my everything except what I could carry on my back,  and of course my Son had to go live with his Grandparents.~

~End of April

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